Post by ipsey on Jan 2, 2021 11:53:29 GMT -5
When they kissed it was full of need and passion. She tried to fight back the despair as she pulled him along with her. Her movements were without thought, even backwards; quickly up the steps and around the corner. Into her rooms and past the inkstains, slamming the door behind her. It was only when he pulled back after touching her face and finding her bloody tears that she even realised she was crying.
“Lux, what the hell?” He said, looking at her blood on his fingers. She shook her head and pressed forward towards him again, reaching for him, but he held her back. “What’s wrong, Peaches?” His gruff voice was tender towards her, a softness she wasn’t expecting.
She rejected it with a shake of her head. “No! Not tonight. Please, no. I don’t want to be Peaches or… or Lux or… or anyone else.” She trembled with her pent up energy, wanting to fight but finding nothing to fight.
“Who do ya want to be tonight, then?” He asked her. He was confused, but still kind. He took her by the hands and sat down with her on the bed, just listening to her.
“I’m Lucienne. Please… please just… let me be myself tonight. I haven’t been myself in a very long time.” She said quietly, trying to stand up. He held her hands firmly, and pulled her against him. He held her with one arm around her shoulder - just like he’d held her their first night. She looked down at his hand on her arm, in just the same way. Again, she did not fight her instinct, though it was different from the last time. She crawled into his lap and put her head against his shoulder, falling into a soft stillness with him.
“Alright, Lucienne.” He said quietly, kissing her hair. She closed her eyes at the touch, and let out a soft, sobbing breath. “You don’t gotta tell me what happened between you and Anna, but I’ll listen to whatever you got to say.”
“… Five things I can see.” She said quietly, her eyes darting around through the darkness.
“What’s that?” He asked her, looking down at her. Tear stained and blood streaked, he still found her beautiful and wild, even as cornered and vulnerable as she looked now.
“Something Henri had me do when he was teaching me to fight the Beast. Focus the senses. Five things I can see.” She breathed short, sharp breaths through her nose, and looked up at him. “Your hair in the moonlight.” She said with a brief smile that faded as quickly as it came. “It’s so red. I like it. You look like a living flame.”
He chuckled at her. “Go on. What else, then?” If he wanted more or expected different from her, he didn’t show her. His patience was new to her, and she explored it gently.
“Your eyes. I like them too. Like a storm.” Her eyes drifted down to his fingers. “Your hands. My blood. Oh… oh, I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t, P… Lucienne.” He spoke to her firmly, but softly. “What’s the last thing you see?”
She trembled as the memory flooded her mind. Henri carrying her through the water, the salt stinging her eyes and the world going stormy black - then his mouth on hers, breathing for her. She saw his face, but he wasn’t there. He wasn’t real. Not at this time, not at this moment. She shook her head, turning towards him, and saw her own blood on his shirt. “Oh… your shirt. I’ll get Serena to…”
“No, come back to me.” He said softly, tilting her chin up to look her in the eyes. “You saw five things. What’s next?”
“…Four things I can hear.” She holds his gaze, nodding. “Um… I hear music, from the Tap room. And… Roxanne, downstairs. And… I hear me. And you.” She noticed her trembling had stopped, but she could still feel the Beast struggling within her. She did not tell him about the rushing in her ears that muffled everything like that night in the water where everything closed in around her.
“Good so far.” He said without looking away from her. “What’s next?”
“… Three things I can… “ She held up her hand, touching his hair. “… Three things I can touch.” She said. Her hands were dry, but they felt clammy. She forced herself to focus on him and his very real presence all around her. “… You keep slicking your hair back but I like it wild. It’s like a lion that way.”
“Stay with me, Lucienne.” He said with a smile. She loved his smile, and she put her forehead on his.
“… Your skin.” She said quietly, her voice barely a whisper as she leaned in closer. “… Your mouth.” She said, kissing him gently.
Their kisses had always been wild, hungry, passionate things, unrestrained and unreserved. The gentleness scared her in a way, but she wasn’t ready to let go just yet. Her Beast grew quieter yet, but still rumbled in the back of her mind.
“I’m starting to like this,” He said when she pulled away. She pushed at him gently, feeling a return to playful affection, and they lay down together on the bed.
“Two things I can smell.” She said, curling up against him, turning to face him as they lay on her pillow. She licked her fingers and wiped away the blood from her face. “Mmm. My own blood. I’m delightful.” Before he could speak, she looked at him. “And you. All of my favourite smells tonight. Pipe smoke and peppermint. Cold and hot at the same time. I’m here, now. With you.” She smelled the sea salt, but it was just the normal smell of the lagoon from Venice. She didn’t feel choked or struggling. For the moment, her Beast was quiet. She was still. She could focus.
He nodded as he looked at her. “What’s the last thing?”
She didn’t answer him right away. She went back over the things that were here in front of her, the senses that mattered, the reality of the world she was in right now. He was here, he was present. He was the flame but he was the water and he was the stone and the air. Henri had been all of those things for her at one point and she had lived because of him.
But Henri was not here. In this room, in this darkness, there was only herself and Innor. He’d been there, waiting and patient, for her to come back to him. And now she was, fully present and immersed in the moment with him. Her grief no longer threatened to drown her. The storm could wait for another night.
“Something I can taste.” She looked at him with a soft smile. “Will you help me with that?”
“Lux, what the hell?” He said, looking at her blood on his fingers. She shook her head and pressed forward towards him again, reaching for him, but he held her back. “What’s wrong, Peaches?” His gruff voice was tender towards her, a softness she wasn’t expecting.
She rejected it with a shake of her head. “No! Not tonight. Please, no. I don’t want to be Peaches or… or Lux or… or anyone else.” She trembled with her pent up energy, wanting to fight but finding nothing to fight.
“Who do ya want to be tonight, then?” He asked her. He was confused, but still kind. He took her by the hands and sat down with her on the bed, just listening to her.
“I’m Lucienne. Please… please just… let me be myself tonight. I haven’t been myself in a very long time.” She said quietly, trying to stand up. He held her hands firmly, and pulled her against him. He held her with one arm around her shoulder - just like he’d held her their first night. She looked down at his hand on her arm, in just the same way. Again, she did not fight her instinct, though it was different from the last time. She crawled into his lap and put her head against his shoulder, falling into a soft stillness with him.
“Alright, Lucienne.” He said quietly, kissing her hair. She closed her eyes at the touch, and let out a soft, sobbing breath. “You don’t gotta tell me what happened between you and Anna, but I’ll listen to whatever you got to say.”
“… Five things I can see.” She said quietly, her eyes darting around through the darkness.
“What’s that?” He asked her, looking down at her. Tear stained and blood streaked, he still found her beautiful and wild, even as cornered and vulnerable as she looked now.
“Something Henri had me do when he was teaching me to fight the Beast. Focus the senses. Five things I can see.” She breathed short, sharp breaths through her nose, and looked up at him. “Your hair in the moonlight.” She said with a brief smile that faded as quickly as it came. “It’s so red. I like it. You look like a living flame.”
He chuckled at her. “Go on. What else, then?” If he wanted more or expected different from her, he didn’t show her. His patience was new to her, and she explored it gently.
“Your eyes. I like them too. Like a storm.” Her eyes drifted down to his fingers. “Your hands. My blood. Oh… oh, I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t, P… Lucienne.” He spoke to her firmly, but softly. “What’s the last thing you see?”
She trembled as the memory flooded her mind. Henri carrying her through the water, the salt stinging her eyes and the world going stormy black - then his mouth on hers, breathing for her. She saw his face, but he wasn’t there. He wasn’t real. Not at this time, not at this moment. She shook her head, turning towards him, and saw her own blood on his shirt. “Oh… your shirt. I’ll get Serena to…”
“No, come back to me.” He said softly, tilting her chin up to look her in the eyes. “You saw five things. What’s next?”
“…Four things I can hear.” She holds his gaze, nodding. “Um… I hear music, from the Tap room. And… Roxanne, downstairs. And… I hear me. And you.” She noticed her trembling had stopped, but she could still feel the Beast struggling within her. She did not tell him about the rushing in her ears that muffled everything like that night in the water where everything closed in around her.
“Good so far.” He said without looking away from her. “What’s next?”
“… Three things I can… “ She held up her hand, touching his hair. “… Three things I can touch.” She said. Her hands were dry, but they felt clammy. She forced herself to focus on him and his very real presence all around her. “… You keep slicking your hair back but I like it wild. It’s like a lion that way.”
“Stay with me, Lucienne.” He said with a smile. She loved his smile, and she put her forehead on his.
“… Your skin.” She said quietly, her voice barely a whisper as she leaned in closer. “… Your mouth.” She said, kissing him gently.
Their kisses had always been wild, hungry, passionate things, unrestrained and unreserved. The gentleness scared her in a way, but she wasn’t ready to let go just yet. Her Beast grew quieter yet, but still rumbled in the back of her mind.
“I’m starting to like this,” He said when she pulled away. She pushed at him gently, feeling a return to playful affection, and they lay down together on the bed.
“Two things I can smell.” She said, curling up against him, turning to face him as they lay on her pillow. She licked her fingers and wiped away the blood from her face. “Mmm. My own blood. I’m delightful.” Before he could speak, she looked at him. “And you. All of my favourite smells tonight. Pipe smoke and peppermint. Cold and hot at the same time. I’m here, now. With you.” She smelled the sea salt, but it was just the normal smell of the lagoon from Venice. She didn’t feel choked or struggling. For the moment, her Beast was quiet. She was still. She could focus.
He nodded as he looked at her. “What’s the last thing?”
She didn’t answer him right away. She went back over the things that were here in front of her, the senses that mattered, the reality of the world she was in right now. He was here, he was present. He was the flame but he was the water and he was the stone and the air. Henri had been all of those things for her at one point and she had lived because of him.
But Henri was not here. In this room, in this darkness, there was only herself and Innor. He’d been there, waiting and patient, for her to come back to him. And now she was, fully present and immersed in the moment with him. Her grief no longer threatened to drown her. The storm could wait for another night.
“Something I can taste.” She looked at him with a soft smile. “Will you help me with that?”